Come on folks....take a good look! If you see this man, step up and perform a citizen's arrest, we can't afford to just let these injustices continue!
He has a list of offenses that authorities refuse to talk about, and it was with great diligence, late nights, and much hard work that I managed to find many of his transgressions. I have listed them for you below. Read them carefully, and be aware of them should you be the one to encounter this individual.
1. His most common offense is chronic instances of Breaking & Entering. Now, the unusual thing about his B&E is that he seems to only make entry into our humble abodes solely through our fireplace chimneys. Strangely enough, even the houses that don't have fireplaces....he manages to get in from the roof. Authorities have yet to figure this part out, but forensic scientists across the world are working diligently to explain these odd occurrences.
2. He tends to use a different alias for every country. I can't list them all here, but here are just a few....
Santa Claus, Santa, Kris Kringle - USA, Canada
Pere Noel - Belgium, France
Weihnachtsmann - Germany
Father Christmas - United Kingdom
Ded Moroz - RussiaThere are many more countries and many other names. I'm sorry I can't list them all but I am in a rush to get this post up so that you can review it. If your country isn't listed you can try contacting your local authorities to see if they will divulge his alias in your area, but don't expect them to be forthcoming with their information.
3. His mode of transportation is generally by air, but he tends to also use sleighs in the more remote areas. Please be on the lookout as his aircraft is said to have a bright red light used for a headlight. Also, because his preferred mode of transport is by air, he's generally followed by the FAA, and meteorologists worldwide. Knowing this, and that it is frequently broadcast widely to the public, it's unfathomable that the authorities haven't been able to catch this dastardly criminal.
4. While authorities are unable to catch this person, there is significant photographic evidence that he has been traumatizing small children and pets, generally, for some reason, only during the winter months. (Photographic evidence of said traumatizations below....)
When is this insanity supposed to end? The authorities aren't doing their job nearly well enough, and, even with help from organizations and individuals in the FAA and the meteorological community, this man has yet to be caught! If you see him, if you catch him in your home, please call the authorities. I hear, though this is not confirmed, that he can be lured and/or bribed with milk and cookies sometime around midnight between Dec. 24th and 25th.....if you catch him proceed with caution, and good luck!!
Jewell =) xo