I would really like to think that I have the capacity to say something witty AND wise all in the same sentence about this topic, but....no. I really have nothing. I mean, really, I just don't get it, and if I don't get it, you don't get witty AND wise. Sorry! Thank you for playing, and please feel free to try again! =)
For example, TV shows like this one....
....creep me way the fuck out! And that's not even a joke. If you have never seen or heard of this show...just plug the name into your search engine of choice. Hell, there's probably clips of it on YouTube. I can't watch it because I can't get past the creep factor in the flipping commercials. Really....search the interwebs for images of the girls that appear on this show. As if the whole stage mom thing wasn't creepy enough and worthy of some specialized sort of intervention in and of itself, the way the girls are dressed AND act is just plain sad, weird, creepy, mind bogglingly, jaw droppingly....sick. All that and so much more that I am at a loss to be able to come up with words to cover it appropriately.
And if that isn't bad enough, then you have people like Heidi Montag who take the whole body loathing, self image, thing waaaay too far. If you haven't heard of her before, let me try to help out. Apparently she was on a show called "The Hills" (I know nothing about the show, what channel it's on, whether it is supposed to be fictional or "reality" (3)), and apparently because of this show she became "famous" (4). Also, best as I can tell, she's been a part of a select public eye since 2006-ish give or take a millenia. Anywho, what I actually recognize her name for is because she recently made the news for having gone in to have 10 (5) plastic surgery procedures in one single day. (6 & 6b) Anyway, in my opinion (7) she was much prettier before than after! Have a look......
Heidi - Before Surgery (2006)
Heidi - After 10 Surgeries in 1 day (2010)
I just don't get all this, truly. Of course, the whole plastic surgery thing always get play where Joan Rivers is concerned. The woman has had so many nips and tucks that a mannequin looks more human than she does.
All I can say is that I am 100% pure, USA grown flab, and proud (ish). =)
(1) - I mean one of us around here needs to do it, and since her's judgment on certain things seems to be a little more skewed than mine...I'm probably slightly better at the whole thinking thing!
(2) - I know!! It's mind bogglingly wild how a mere dog's thoughts could end up leading on such an philosophically unimpressive tangent!
(3) - And seriously...were "reality" shows ever reality? Survivor...don't understand the draw. Big Brother...pompous idiots who think entirely too much of themselves. Operation Repo....really? Do I even need to go there? Anything with Paris Hilton...not even coke could make something she does a reality unless it is viewed through the viewfinder of "Cops - Las Vegas - Party Girls Gone Wild Who Are Celebrities For No Reason Other Than Daddy's Got More Money Than Any Diety In Any Culture In Any Part Of The World And Couldn't Sound Remotely Intelligent If Her Voice Was Dubbed Over By A Professional Voice Person!" Edition *deep breath*
(4) - Really, fame and celebrity titles should be reserved for those who actually do something big enough in this world that the majority of the population might actually recognize them for something other than being stupid!
(5) - Yes, that is a 1 and an zero (0). As in 10. As in 10 times more than 1.
(6) - Oh, and her surgeon that did all this work...a super, uber genius!! Killed recently in a car wreck because he was texting and driving.....apparently close to the edge of a cliff. Texting while driving - not the brightest bulb in the box type idea. Texting while driving near the edge of a cliff? Yeah - that just earns you a dumbass award! Posthumously of course!
--- (6b) - And sadly no...I am not into celebrity/Hollywood drama/gossip/bullshit. Want to know why I know this crap?? Because apparently this is what is considered NEWS by any number of news outlets in any format you can possibly imagine! Yes. Really.
(7) - Not that anyone asked! =-p
Now, off to find the number for a doctor to hike the girls up to where they belong, and another to fix my eyes so I can dump the glasses. *snort*